news of the world

news: there's a new david thorne article up here

dillon's restaurant, burnside's cafe in craighall, now has a website

and the sartorialist, jono cane's favourite website, "ever"
has a whole new look and feel (thanks to sarah for this one)...
click here

the first riposte

as effing relevant as ever.

thank eff i'm leaving vega forever in a few months.

bitter. yes.

thanks angie

here's my little sister, angie. i still owe her a birthday gift from 3 years ago so in lieu i've decided to make her world famous and feature her on the kholkhoz.



and this isn't one of my sweet pics. it might've been my aunt or mum took it.

incontinent

|inˈkäntənənt; -ˈkäntn-ənt|
adjective
1. having no or insufficient voluntary control over urination or defecation.

yeah, that's not what i was looking for at all

oh, god, this is the best website in the entire world. this guy should get a black pencil for it or something. go read it and live a better life.


click the image or hit here

thanks to indi for this one. go to her blog to show your appreciation. and i think you can play with fish too. perhaps.

i know all about the crimea

well i was gonna pop the pics i took for jesse's istd project up. but i see he's already put the whole lot up. anyway, since i've loaded them onto flickr (and bandwidth should never be wasted after all) here's a few other ones i took on the day/night.







the other shots i took are also on flickr, but you've probably seen them on the posters below so i won't bore you again here.

istd 2010

these were my typographic posters for this years istd, i know right? no typography but your smart kids im sure you can work it all out, if anyone needs an explanation let me know, oh and please click on the poster if you want to see it BIGGER and with a readable bunch of text for each one... (theres three more on flickr) they're really big so i had to scale down for the blog sorry. seriously though just click on them

199, 999

well. i hate my life.
but dillon's car did hit 200,000 km's the other day.

you've heard this before. in book for student d&ad.

i won an In Book award for student d&ad. yes, it has been mentioned before. but now i have something for you to look at.
no, not another pug. just the work this time. sorry to disappoint.

click to see the campaign at the d&ad site.

thanks to certain people for their invaluable help. raph, shelley, nick, shakera. thanks.

and a particular thank you to angie. my wee little sister. who ran all around london to print & mount, and then got lost delivering my work just in time for the deadline.
thank you.

in book but no cigar

well i didn't get one of those. but remember the last pug you got? when i finished d&ad? well, scroll some more and there'll be another. a celebratory pug, if you will. because although i didn't get a pencil, i did get In Book for that entry. which isn't too bad either. here it is from bizcommunity's mouth. (wedgethemong is chad for those of you not yet in the know)

i'll upload the work as soon as i'm allowed to. here's your pug.

don't laugh

oh, i wish i could to say that this was my contribution to south african politics, but it isn't. it was someone else's.

kraft can't touch this

well. with a decent cash and shares offer i'll think about it.



yes. i've made my own chocolate. it is the best chocolate in the world. if you hold your breath long enough i will start making it in little pug-shaped molds.

watch out. kholkhoz chocolate is coming.

this is dillon

and he opened a cafe/restaurant. to prove it, here's a picture of his hand making coffee. and below that is a picture of his sister jessica wiping the machine. well, her hand at least. she's behind the incredible food they serve. not physically - she's a chef, comedian, and purveyor of the finest chocolate cake in existence.
and now there's a website. okay, more like an online business card. but it fits wonderfully on an iPhone. i'll make something better soon.

or in a while.




this restaurant/cafe is called burnside's. it's in craighall. and they serve the best food in jo'burg. and the second best coffee (the best is at my house). their details are on this business card (click the image for the big/readable version at flickr):



that number is no longer correct. call 011 326 3970 from now on. that's not my fault though. they're open for dinner on thursday and friday for now. take someone special. you'll get action. book in advance. it's a good idea.

but. you ask yourself: how does this relate to the kholkhoz? no, we haven't just become a cheap mouthpiece indiscriminately punting whatever trendy eatery for fame and untold fortune, no... this is relevant because i like coffee. and because i designed burnside's awesome menus and stationery. go give them a look. but please, don't roll, bend or wet them. they're uncoated. and i will feel inclined to end you. on the spot.



burnsides.co.za

something i did today

charlie: Look, kid, I - how much you weigh, son? When you weighed one hundred and sixty-eight pounds you were beautiful. You coulda been another Billy Conn, and that skunk we got you for a manager, he brought you along too fast.

terry: It wasn't him, Charley, it was you. Remember that night in the Garden you came down to my dressing room and you said, "Kid, this ain't your night. We're going for the price on Wilson." You remember that? "This ain't your night"! My night! I coulda taken Wilson apart! So what happens? He gets the title shot outdoors on the ballpark and what do I get? A one-way ticket to Palooka-ville! You was my brother, Charley, you shoulda looked out for me a little bit. You shoulda taken care of me just a little bit so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money.

charlie: Oh I had some bets down for you. You saw some money.

terry: You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it. It was you, Charley.

wedge enters d&ad student

london transport network grinds to halt as all hold thumbs.

he has. and it did. d&ad is done. thank goodness.

just thought i'd post a little self-congratulatory note for all the people with no lives of their own to ogle and wow at.

according to the rules of the competition i can't upload the work here until after the awards ceremony has taken place. or something along those lines. selfish of them i know. but. here's a picture of a pug instead.



and that's worth the bandwidth. so is the other pic of him at flickr.

aaaand i've published a new drafted post from a little while ago. either scroll down a bit or hit here to see unobtanium