damaged control

oh, wait, two weeks, one brainstorm, one kief indie soundtrack, too many camera angles to stare at, one stick of mitchum, several copyright claims, five words, two desperate video deletions, and one very hopeful response video later...

and all is well in the world of adriaan willem bergh.

he's sticking to that old maxim that there's 'no such things as bad publicity'. perhaps not. or perhaps that's just an outdated way of making oneself feel better for looking like a complete twunt, that takes no notice of the effect of social media. yes. facebook and friends made bad publicity possible. and we all thought it was about connecting and making the world a smaller place. naive.

so here for you is adriaan willem bergh's latest foray into image making/rescuing.
watch it quick before he rips it down like he did the original video. you know, cos there's no such thing as bad publicity, right?

don't touch my olfa on my studio.

life can be ironic at the best of times, like when chad reminded to keep my olfa blade out of sight so that it doesn't get taken to studio and become lost forever.

and then reminded me that i'd stolen olfa anyways.

man what an awesome story! i just changed my password to chadisadick he's the BEST! :D

thanks for explaining capitalism

no problem mister fashion designer man.

it's nice here

feels like we're really fitting in.

good morning sailor jerry

yes it finally feels like i've woken up, woken up to something amazing

a hangover

i know? but as far as hangovers go this one was by far the best because drinking a full bottle of sailor jerry rum the night before made it all worth it

and the man in charge of sailor jerry south africa is brett rogers, and like he said he's just looking for some attention so look them up on

facebook or sailorjerry.com

not sure what to say about this

well. this guy's definitely winning something. he's either getting 'chop of the month' or 'satirist of the week'. whichever it is i'm laughing at him.
what a gent. he's even making me say words like 'gent'.
chine. boytchie. oke. bru. kief.
eff, i can't stop.
shmaak. laaik. chune. shweet.
taailand. peroni. sharks.
bint. proh-teen.
bench!

>>HALT! HALT!<< found another copy of the video that some other kind soul has ripped and uploaded. thanks friend. so that means: do watch it now.

>HALT! UPDATE< wait! don't bother trying to watch this video. apparently you now have to be invited to view it. so guess that means that this dude was being quite genuine when he said 'my idea of a perfect date would be a romantic dinner wiff a gor-jus girl but int-elergent'. guess he got embarrassed by his striking originality and like all the true geniuses withdrew from society, protecting his before-its-time gift to humankind through self-ostracism.
or. more likely, the thought of hundreds of pairs of eyes ogling his boksburg bowl cut and prize jet polyester chinos entirely royalty free sickened him to the bottom of his extreme-sports toned stomach. nee! he shouted. his patriotic, new south africa, enthusiasm and concern for the sick and weak couldn't bear that people, how dare they, might look at him on their computers and that this transaction would not result in at least a month's supply of whey protein or at very least some kief, lekker new go-faster stripes for the opel opc his dad got him.
okay. i'm over it. just really bummed i can't vote for him now. was literally creaming my pants in anticipation of the inevitable acceptance speech video. oh well, 'spose i'll have to cancel the spit braai.




thanks to thereza for this daai-mond, bra.

cinnamon rings and roundabouts

we've got doughnuts, massive macs, a brief. and, by some miracle of coincidence, an office.
we're under no impressions. just saying. but interning is pretty okay. and this time konrad and i are a team.
i left my camera at home so this is looking like a text update. of literally no value at all. to anyone. apart from the one or two cyberstalker obsessives who i know track my life with the desperate fervent interest of unemployed fashion-blog followers. because they probably are.

tomorrow i'll be making the best coffee in the world. in parkhurst. at a garish building that satanists painted black and landscaped with astroturf. it's called the super and i'm sure it'll be good. just avoid the people in robes carrying books and candles.

wait. i found a picture. the coffee will come from one of these machines, a faema e61 legend. konrad says you should come and get some of my hot white cream on your lips. flat white that is.

on this day

dillon was born. well, not this one, but a few days and 21 years before this post. point is we had an daaa-liii-shus party at burnside's, tequila flowed like the ancient rivers, and numerous posters of dillon striking his swedish extreme sports calendar model pose.

happy birthday boytch. and thanks for the party.

word on the street

is that today is a good day. as loading bay would say. dill, kyle and myself all completed loyalty cards in 6 days. if you're in cape town go there. they have fried chicken in a bucket. and the best barista in the country. and jeffrey, the best guy ever. and, according to maria, an owner called jon-paul best described as "perfection".



aside from loading bay cape town was okay because i managed to bribe the loerie judges into awarding me a craft gold (pictured) for fortywords and a silver for that metro poster campaign. yay. who said corruption doesn't pay.

and just so you don't ask here's directions. no excuses.
click it to view large at flickr.

but then i was like...

so i thought i'd post something cool about portfolios and how they were going, so i started designing something appropriate for the post

that guy: the pitch

one three-part cinematic artpiece.
two foreign film audio tracks.
three new german names.
four loerie nominations.
five-star performances.
six days in cape town.
and an update seven weeks overdue...

...are the numerically-ordered set of facts that herald the long-awaited return to cinema advertising for the kholkhoz.

the final ad may or may not have been produced by now, but here's the pitch for the new ster-kinekor vision mission ad. in three parts. strat. storyboard. extension.

watch. they're fun. they're hd. and there's a solid minute of pug footage hidden in there too.





to avoid being confused by the initial english section of the next video, think in english again. and it might be worth explaining that all the people in our presentation weren't allowed in unless they received a 'that guy' or 'not that guy' sticker. the process was the same as we proposed it would be in actual cinemas. to get a 'not that guy' sticker you had to donate 2.50zar.


we'll stick the finished ad up as soon as it's done.

credit: debussy, clair de lune. the audio track from the lives of others. the german audio track from the unbearable lightness of being. danke.

and an extra special thanks goes to eleni labrou. she drew our storyboard. exactly as we had imagined it. in record time. in a coffee shop. and with the sweetest smile. thanks.

news of the world

news: there's a new david thorne article up here

dillon's restaurant, burnside's cafe in craighall, now has a website

and the sartorialist, jono cane's favourite website, "ever"
has a whole new look and feel (thanks to sarah for this one)...
click here

the first riposte

as effing relevant as ever.

thank eff i'm leaving vega forever in a few months.

bitter. yes.

thanks angie

here's my little sister, angie. i still owe her a birthday gift from 3 years ago so in lieu i've decided to make her world famous and feature her on the kholkhoz.



and this isn't one of my sweet pics. it might've been my aunt or mum took it.

incontinent

|inˈkäntənənt; -ˈkäntn-ənt|
adjective
1. having no or insufficient voluntary control over urination or defecation.